Yesterday a young man, let's call him John, approached me with concern about his friend. John is a 4 of Spades and his friend, let's call him Charles, is a 3 of Clubs.
John was concerned about Charles' depression. Charles wasn't taking any steps toward getting help aside from smoking the occasional blunt.
The burden of their friendship was getting too heavy. John wanted to help Charles but he didn't want to be Charles' crutch.
John asked me to check the cards to understand the purpose of their friendship. He also wanted some advice on the next steps.
The 4 of Spades (John) and the 3 of clubs (Charles) have a Mercury connection. They have a special way of communicating that feels like they are the only people who understand one another. It is very magnificent to meet a Mercury connection during your lifetime. It helps you feel less alone in the world.
Charles' 3 of Clubs birth card is prone to mental unrest and addiction. Given Charles' upbringing current state of depression, he would find a substance to abuse soon if he didn't receive professional he[p.
I told John all of this and he looked distraught. (Wouldn't you be?) John didn't know how to simultaneously help Charles and save his own sanity.
My advice for John was this . . . be the support, not the savior.
For example, in Christianity Jesus is the Savior. He creates the path of enlightenment and righteousness for all to follow. His disciples are the support. They help keep others on the path that Jesus created.
"You can't be Jesus for him," I said. "You can't create his path for him. Charles needs to find that enlightenment within his own spiritual journey and with professional medical assistance. As his support, you can help Charles find his path and keep him accountable for it. This is how you still support Charles but lessen the burden to carry. You are allowed to make yourself a priority in your life and still be a good friend".
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